It’s Fridays With Psaki!



We don't usually work on Fridays, are Fridays with Psaki different from other days with Psaki? Guess it will just be a surprise!


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LIVE: President No-Malarkey Talkin’ About Semiconductors. Doesn’t That Sound Sexy?



Tell us, Politico Playbook:

Biden and Commerce Secretary GINA RAIMONDO will deliver remarks about semiconductor supplies, the supply chain and efforts to “make more in America.”

Ooh!

Watch live!


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LIVE: Civil Rights Leaders Tell Congress About Voter Suppression, In Case They Hadn’t Heard



The House Judiciary Committee's subcommittee on the Constitution, Civil Rights and Civil Liberties is hosting civil rights leaders this morning to discuss voter suppression. It's even more important after what Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema helped their Republican friends do to American democracy last night.

Here, watch a hearing:


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David Perdue Would Also Too Like Some Election Cops For Georgia



Loser former GOP senator David Perdue is just hellbent on beclowning himself as much as possible in his effort to primary Georgia GOP Governor Brian Kemp, as punishment for Kemp's insufficient and inconsistent tongue-bathing of Donald Trump's armpits. Are Georgians clamoring for Perdue? Haha no. We cannot think of one person in the state of Georgia who is clamoring for this old crusty idiot who lost his Senate race to the dashing Jon Ossoff.

Of course, this is mostly about Trump's Big Lie, and because Perdue isn't necessarily known for having original thoughts, he's copy/pasting the thing Florida GOP Gov. Ron DeSantis announced in his state of the state speech last week, about his desire to create an election police force of election cops, to cop feels all over elections:

Oh for fucks sake.


Let's see what Perdue has to say.

"What happened in 2020 should never happen again," Perdue said on Thursday morning as he announced his proposal to create a law enforcement unit that would investigate election crimes and fraud in Georgia and would have the authority to make arrests.

Nothing happened in 2020, you limp dildo. Joe Biden goddamn won Georgia, Raphael Warnock beat Kelly Loeffler, and Jon Ossoff beat your ass.

Or as Fox News explains more politely in its article:

Georgia was one of a half dozen states where now President Biden narrowly edged former President Donald Trump to win the White House in the 2020 election.

Yes. Fox News even helpfully reminds us that Georgia counted its votes three times. But Brian Kemp and Georgia GOP Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger flat refused to find imaginary votes in their assholes for Donald Trump and commit some real election-stealing crimes to preserve white Republican power in Georgia, and that is what Perdue is REALLY performatively mad about right now.

"When Georgians had legitimate questions about the November election, Kemp refused to investigate or fix problems before the January runoff.," Perdue charged in a statement to Fox News. "Leave it to a 20-year career politician like Kemp to sit on his hands when we needed him most. He failed us, and Georgians lost confidence that their vote would count."

Fuck off.

Georgians didn't have "legitimate questions." Donald Trump and sniveling sycophantic charlatans like David Perdue helped fill their heads with malarkey stories about imaginary voter fraud, which led to them having questions based on what they had heard from men they trusted, i.e. Trump and sniveling sycophantic charlatans. There was no organic process here. The "legitimate questions" of white Georgia Republicans were literally force-fed into their mouths.

Perdue's not done pulling his pud about this:

Perdue emphasized that "the purpose of this law enforcement unit is to give Georgians confidence that only legal votes will be counted, and that anyone who tries to interfere with our elections will be arrested and prosecuted."

And he described his call for elections to be independently audited before they are certified as "a commonsense step to safeguard our election integrity and ensure transparency and accountability in our system. When I'm Governor, we'll have the safest and securest elections in the country."

Whatever.

This has of course caused yelling from Brian Kemp's camp, which is saying Perdue is a liar (they call him that a lot) and bragging about its own efforts to fuck the vote, with his spokesman saying that "while Perdue was golfing for the last year, Governor Kemp was fighting the woke mob to champion the strongest election integrity law in the nation."

Good God, may they fight and fight and fight.

Go give Stacey Abrams some money while they're fighting.

[Fox News]

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Let’s See What President Biden Has To Say For Himself!



The president is doing a news conference this afternoon, and we are going to ... liveblog it, we guess? Yeah why not. We "love" you, after all.

We got a feeling it's gonna be kind of lit, since journalists are kind of obsessed with throwing both-sides crap at Joe Biden just to prove to each other that they are fair and balanced after four years of Donald Trump.

Also there's that whole thing about how his agenda is kind of stalled, because of these two absolutely worthless shitheel moron Democratic senators whose names we currently forget.

Let's watch together.


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4:02: Oh hey, look at President Mister On-Timey!

He is bragging about vaccinating people and giving them jobs and taking kids out of poverty and creating small businesses and people making more money.

TYRANT COMMIE.

4:04: Biden says we're removing lead pipes, which is very unfair to anti-vaxxers and Fox News hosts probably, who could theoretically at some point decide "licking lead pipes" is the next thing they should try once they get bored of "horse paste" and "pee."

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If It’s Tuesday, There’s A White House Press Briefing



Allegedly!

"Infrastructure Implementation Coordinator" Mitch Landrieu is also briefing, along with Jen Psaki.

Just kidding, it's not allegedly because it already started because the briefing was on time for the first time in recent memory and we didn't anticipate that and anyway, good story, us.

If you want to watch the whole briefing it's real simple, just rewind it.

There you go! You're watchin' it!


youtu.be

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Dr. Oz Challenges Dr. Fauci To Brain Duel Outside Saloon At High Noon, SHUT UP HE’S SERIOUS STOP LAUGHING



Don't know if y'all saw this the other day, but Media Matters had a big report featuring all the times Dr. Mehmet Oz, the quack silly guy doctor who thinks he should get to be a Republican senator from Pennsylvania, pushed colloidal silver on his old show. Yes, the stuff that turns people literally blue. He's just a really good doctor.

Anyway, he went on Newsmax and demanded Dr. Anthony Fauci, a good doctor, debate him.




Ridiculous. He sounds like Ben Shapiro climbing onto a stepladder and craning his neck to shriek "DEBATE MEEEEEEEE!1!1!1!" at normal height person Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

We've discussed this many times, how wingnuts scream "DEBATE ME1111!1!!1!!!" at people they know won't waste their time, because they're better and smarter than the wingnuts shrieking. Often they're screaming it at women. Sometimes, if it's the host interviewing Dr. Oz right there, they're screaming it at Muppets. Lately they've been gripping their peeners between their thumbs and forefingers and whacking it furiously to the idea that Rachel Maddow is scared to have Madison Cawthorn on her show because she's scared to DEBATE HIM111!!!1!!!

It's all so sad.

And so here is Dr. Oz, literally just a fucking quack and an airhead, going on Newsmax and challenging Dr. Fauci to a debate. Host Eric Bolling frames it as breaking news, that this pissant has a "throwdown" challenge for Fauci. "You have something to announce, breaking, exclusively on the show," said Bolling. "The challenge is a debate!" said Oz. "I'm challenging him! Doctor to doctor!"

You know, like real doctors do.

Oz wants Dr. Fauci to DEBATE MEE!1!1!!1 about vaccine mandates and natural immunity and therapeutics and whatever else. "I think Dr. Fauci is basically the J. Edgar Hoover of public health, he's a petty tyrant!"


Giphy


We just can't even type this post anymore. It's too stupid.

Bolling said he would love to moderate the debate, and also said he would get Fauci's answer about whether Fauci accepts Oz's challenge to do brain wizard games with him outside the saloon at high noon, so that's gonna be pretty funny when Fauci doesn't respond. And then we'll be treated to probably a week of dumb fucking conservatives congratulating themselves because they think Dr. Fauci is scared to debate Dr. Oz.

That's right.

Dr. Fauci.

Scared to debate Dr. Oz.

As a great man once said this week, "What a moron. Jesus Christ."


These are the people in this post:

Crap Words From Dr. Oz's Senate Announcement, Or Crap Medical Advice He Gave On His Show? A QUIZ!

Ben Shapiro Offers Woman $10,000 To Talk To Him

Dr. Fauci Goes Rand Paul's Neighbor In Senate Hearing


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RNC Chair Ronna Romney McDaniel Will See Debate Commission IN HELL!



Here we go again. The RNC is whining about debates and threatening to boycott them forever. It's kind of a thing they've been doing for years now. This seems to be the culmination of a back-and-forth that started back in the extremely timely time of last summer. And it's definitely something we need to be thinking about in ... *checks watch* ... January of 2022.

Ronna Willard Mittens Mormonbottoms Romney McDaniel — it's important to type the whole name Jesus gave her — has written a NASTYGRAM to the Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD) telling them this is their last and final warning. If they don't change all the rules to make it easier for Republicans to cheat win at debates, and if they don't completely skullfuck reality to the point that they accept Republicans' insistence that completely normal moderators are BIASSSSSSSSS, then the RNC will simply ban all future Republican candidates from participating in debates put on by the CPD.

And if that means there are no debates — because obviously Democrats are not going to agree to debate in the GOP's preferred venue for Democrats, which is with their heads being held under the water in Tucker Carlson's servant toilets — well then guess there won't be any debates.


"So long as the CPD appears intent on stonewalling the meaningful reforms necessary to restore its credibility with the Republican Party as a fair and nonpartisan actor, the RNC will take every step to ensure that future Republican presidential nominees are given that opportunity elsewhere," RNC chairwoman Ronna McDaniel wrote in a letter Thursday to Frank Fahrenkopf and Kenneth Wollack, co-chairs of the debate commission.

Uh huh.

The letter is so stupid, y'all. It's full of demands, which the RNC frames as the CPD's "failures," which include moving at least one of the debates back to before early voting starts, and making sure not to have any moderators who are BIASSSSS. (Remember the list of suggestions the Trump campaign submitted in 2020? Literally the stupidest rightwing pundits alive, like Hugh Hewitt and Maria Bartiromo. You betcha.)

The letter also whines that the CPD's board is no longer nonpartisan, because so many of them "publicly disparag[ed]" Trump. They never will understand that if you nominate the World's Stupidest Hitler to be your nominee, respectable Americans of all political persuasions are probably gonna disparage that guy.

There are other demands on there, situations in which the RNC isn't surprised, just disappointed, but who gives an eff, you don't want to read it.

Also, the RNC is sore offended that anyone would suggest that the demands they are making are some kind of cynical ploy to heavily weight debates in favor of the dumb fucking fascist party:

We are especially frustrated with the CPD’s refusal to enact reforms aimed at ensuring nonpartisanship by claiming that doing so would somehow render the organization more partisan.

Haha fuck you.

Anyway, the letter says if CPD doesn't do what Ronna Willard Mittens Mormonbottoms Romney McDaniel says NOWFUCKINGNOW, then they'll start changing their rules at the next big RNC potluck orgy, which according to NBC News is scheduled for next month.

So that's where things are.

Don't freak out, it's fine. Republicans don't believe in debates, just like they don't believe in Black people or Democrats in general voting, just like they don't believe in accepting election results where Republicans don't win, just like they don't believe in holding accountable the terrorists who organized, ordered, incited, and committed the January 6 attack on the United States. How is "gonna back out of debates now" any different?

The CPD is totally mean to Republicans anyway. It wouldn't let Donald Trump hack COVID droplets all over Joe Biden, which put Trump at an unfair disadvantage because Trump needs to be able to loudly grunt and constantly interrupt and shout over his opponent in person in order to have a chance in debates. It ignored all his hilarious suggestions for moderators. Just totally unfair.

So is this real or is it just Ronna Willard Mittens Mormonbottoms Romney McDaniel blowing angry smoke out her ass?

Who cares, OPEN THREAD.

[NBC News / dumb letter]

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Paul Manafort Wants A Redemption Tour? F*ck Off, Let’s Talk About His Russian Spy BFF Some More



Oh good, it's time for a redemption tour from Paul Manafort. Is anyone interested in that? Is there some constituency out there for Manafort? Are MAGA mouthbreathers dying to sound out the words in his forthcoming book, Political Prisoner: Persecuted, Prosecuted, but not Silenced — LOL — which reportedly comes out in August? (By the way, fuck Simon & Schuster for publishing that dogshit. Mueller prosecutor Andrew Weissmann notes that if Manafort receives dollars for this book, he could be in violation of his plea deal, which doesn't go away just because he was pardoned.)

Manafort went on "Hannity" last night looking like a sickly cartoon character televangelist Liberace fuck-clown, and oh boy, what Kremlin-pleasing bullshit.

During the interview there was this hilarious moment when Manafort talked about how weird it was in the fall of 2016 when the media started reporting on alleged Russian collusion with the Trump campaign. (Remember that it is now gospel in the North Korean news lady world of Fox News that all Russian collusion allegations have been proven to be a hoax, even though the then-Republican led Senate Intelligence Committee released a report in 2020 that revealed massive collusion between the Trump campaign and Russian actors.)




Manafort said he "didn't take it very seriously" in "August of 2016" when the "false narrative" of Russian collusion started, because he knew how "ridiculous" that was. He had to start taking it seriously later, obviously, because the Deep State was after him.

This is very funny because ... shall we go to that Senate Intel Committee report?

Because it was literally "August of 2016" — the second day of that month, to be exact — when Paul Manafort met with his associate Konstantin Kilimnik at the Grand Havana Room in Manhattan to discuss a "peace plan" for Ukraine, which always was code for finding a way to lift the sanctions off Russia, which that nation earned when it invaded Ukraine in 2014. (And oh look where we are again!) Kilimnik, the report explains, "is a Russian intelligence officer." Or in layman's terms, a fuckin' spy.

The report explains that Manafort "sought to secretly share internal Campaign information with Kilimnik" — a Russian spy — on "numerous occasions." That internal campaign information? It was about the Rust Belt, where Trump "won" just months later, even while being soundly rejected by the vote of the American people. The report said, "The Committee obtained some information suggesting Kilimnik may have been connected to the GRU's hack and leak operation targeting the 2016 U.S. election." Their evidence? Redacted. And: "Two pieces of information [...] raise the possibility of Manafort's potential connection to the hack-and-leak operation." Also redacted.

And who had a history of being connected to hacking operations? Why that's just Oleg Deripaska, Putin's favorite oligarch who also used to be Manafort's and Kilimnik's boss. The one Manafort owed fuckin' bigtime. And when did the hacking actually happen in 2016, according to the report? Around March, when Manafort was very bizarrely getting hired to chair the Trump campaign for a salary of zero dollars.

The Committee assesses that Kilimnik likely served as a channel to Manafort for Russian intelligence services, and that those services likely sought to exploit Manafort's access to gain insight info the Campaign. Taken as a whole, Manafort's high-level access and willingness to share information with individuals closely affiliated with the Russian intelligence services, particularly Kilimnik, represented a grave counterintelligence threat.

When President Joe Biden's Treasury Department announced sanctions on Kilimnik last April, they came right out and said it:

During the 2016 U.S. presidential election campaign, Kilimnik provided the Russian Intelligence Services with sensitive information on polling and campaign strategy. Additionally, Kilimnik sought to promote the narrative that Ukraine, not Russia, had interfered in the 2016 U.S. presidential election. In 2018, Kilimnik was indicted on charges of obstruction of justice and conspiracy to obstruct justice regarding unregistered lobbying work.

Yes, we imagine Manafort "didn't take it very seriously" in August 2016 when a narrative was forming that the Trump campaign was colluding with Russia, just as he was literally handing Trump campaign polling data — Rust Belt polling data — to a Russian spy who somehow got it to Russian intelligence, which clearly wasn't hard, since he works for Russian intelligence.

Sean Hannity didn't note any of these facts because he's not here to tell the truth or do journalism.

Elsewhere in the interview, Hannity lied to his audience when he said this:

“You really — in many ways, you, Roger Stone, [George] Papadopoulos, General [Michael] Flynn and Carter Page, the president himself,” Hannity said, referring to various targets of the Russia investigation — “all of this stems from a false, phony narrative based on a false dossier and phony FISA warrants.”

Nope. The Russia investigation did not come from the Steele Dossier or Carter Page's FISA warrants. It started when George Papadopoulos drunk-creamed himself all over an Australian diplomat in public about how he had the secret skinny on Russia ratfucking the election against Hillary Clinton.

As Philip Bump explains at the Washington Post, sounding as exasperated as we are, other parts of the investigation got going at different times, like for instance the Michael Flynn part got going when he lied to FBI agents' faces about his secret dealings with the Russian government and the NSA picked it up — not because they were spying on Flynn, but because they were spying on Russia, you traitorous fuckwits.

Oh yeah, and as Bump notes, Manafort himself had been on the FBI's radar for yearsfuckingyears related to his foreign work.

So yeah, this is all bullshit. And if Paul Manafort wants to be on the news again and Sean Hannity wants to give him reacharounds to help him with his redemption tour, then we'll type this story out each and every time we see his face.

In summary and in conclusion, if you want to watch Laura Ingraham during the handover from Hannity talking about how skinny and amaaaaaaazing Paul Manafort looked, you'll have to click here, because this Wonkette post is over.

[Washington Post]

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